Signs families notice first
- A fall, or a near fall
- Missed or doubled medications
- Weight loss, or an empty or spoiled fridge
- Unpaid bills, late notices or scam calls
- Getting lost or confused, even on familiar routes
- Not bathing or changing clothes
- New dents on the car, or unsafe driving
- Pulling away from friends, church or hobbies
- You or other family are worn out from caregiving
One sign is worth watching. Three or more usually means your parent needs more help than they have now. That doesn't have to mean moving this week. It means making a plan.
How to bring it up with a parent
- Pick a calm time, not right after a scare.
- Lead with what they want: staying safe, keeping their independence, not being a burden.
- Talk about one specific thing, like the fall last month, not everything at once.
- Ask questions and listen. "What would make mornings easier?"
- Offer a visit, not a decision. Touring one place together takes the pressure off.
- Bring in someone they trust: their doctor, a pastor, or an advisor like us.
The steps between home and a move
| Option | What it looks like |
|---|---|
| In-home care | A caregiver comes a few hours a day |
| Adult day program | Days out with activities and meals, home at night |
| Board and care home | A small licensed home with caregivers around the clock |
| Assisted living | A community with meals, activities and daily help |
| Memory care | Secured, dementia-trained care |
Want a second opinion?
Take the 60-second check, or tell us what you’re seeing. He’ll tell you honestly whether it’s time and what your options are.
Updated September 2026 by Shaun and Nick, co-founders of CalValley Senior Living Advisors.